So it's pretty much christmas...

And so here we are, it's the day before christmas, and it's raining and gross outside...
I pretty much hate christmas.

It's not that I hate the happiness or anything grinchy like that, but I hate the way that the world has convoluted the real message of christmas, and replaced it with a guy who only comes out at night, dressed in a red suit, whose name can easily be turned into Satan...

You know of whom I speak, the jolly fat man.. I'm sure he would be pretty jolly, because he's single handedly taken the focus away from the real importance of Christ-mas, and made it into some farcical present swapping anniversary. Now don't get me wrong, I love presents, but the real gift of Christmas was that of Jesus himself, who would one day save all those who would call on him to do so... And as much as Santa would try to suck us all in with his shiny toys and dodgy chinese craftsmanship, it just can't compare to the eternal glory awaiting us in heaven.

So I say again, I hate christmas,.. Not the Christ-mas that was, but the Xmas that it's become.

Yoobie Yoob Yoober, Kerflung Kerflung Kerflung.

Spinach.

The Return of the Shaboom

Inside of a box there is a clever little emu, aptly named emu, whose sole purpose is to serve as a definition of the word aptly, and also to eat cardboard flavoured cardboard with red paint. Emu's friend Emu, who is actually a duck, is brown, not white like it wants to be the colour of the innards of a loaf of bread, but brown. If you put Emu into a box with Emu, then one would be named aptly, and the other's name would still be emu as well. So if one is named emu and named aptly, and the other is named emu and is named without apt, then the combined aptness is greater than or equal to the remainder of the two sides. However you have to factor in the size of the box, and determine its dimensions, because if the box is 20x15x10, then it would be far different to a box that is 10x15x20, especially if you're putting an emu inside... Also one must consider the adverse effects of placing a duck inside of a box that is built for an emu, but if the duck is also named emu, then is there really no problem at all? And now let us consider the uses of a duck. As useful as they are for determining the identity of witches, their greatest value lies in their usefulness when climbing. You may think "What?!?" "Climbing? that doesn't make sense!" or "Gosh that guy is attractive", but I say to you it is true! Ducks are the most useful thing you could ever have while climbing. And to prove it I'll give you a simple explanation... Let's just say you were stuck atop an incredibly high and steep mountain, and you need to get down... However, you don't get down off of mountain, you get down off of a duck. Thereby proving that it is the most useful thing to take with you when climbing.

Now, I believe it is time for me to go, and stop trying to break whatever it is that you claim to be carrying between your ears, be it fish, llama, or penguin.